The Shutdown Culprits Will Be Punished…Right?


shutdown GOP

We failed miserably at our jobs and had to shutdown the office. Clap it up.


The Federal government shutdown sucks. People aren’t getting paid, programs and services are closed, parks and monuments are shuttered, Americans who rely on government benefits will have to suck it up, and our economy could be losing around $300 million a day.

The disappointing media is trying to be “fair” and blame both sides, but let’s just be adults here and accept that House Republicans shutdown our government. Sorry, but you just can’t say “Democrats won’t give in to our demands, so it’s their fault” with a straight face.

Led by a cabal of Tea Partiers, Speaker Boehner et al refused to pass a budget that funded the tyrannical Kenyan President’s beloved Obamacare aka the Affordable Care Act aka the Nazi law that will enslave Americans with affordable healthcare and provide coverage destroy the freedom of  tens of millions of previously uninsured Americans aka this damn law will ruin your life.

Simply stated: a minority party crashed the government because they don’t have the votes to overturn the hated law as per the Constitution. Some might call that ‘treason’, others ‘hostage taking’ or ‘political terrorism’, others call it ‘Patriotism’. Either way, the culprits will be held responsible and punished accordingly. Right?

No chance.

The ballot box is the People’s equalizer, but the People are powerless to change things here. The ideological fanatics responsible for the shutdown will return to districts safely gerrymandered to ensure a Republican will hold the seat for decades. They don’t worry about a pesky Lib or a stupid Democrat questioning the integrity of sinking the ship to flush a turd. But they’ll shit-sure be worrying about the guy out-rightwingin’ him and demanding longer shutdowns and more healthcare taken away.

These “representatives” won’t be scolded, they won’t be ridiculed for ridiculous tactics, they won’t be called out for their bullcrap. Instead, they’ll be celebrated and encouraged to go farther. After all, they only crashed the government – it’s not like they Tweeted a crotch-pic to their mistress or anything!

In the eyes of these Tea Party Patriots, ‘governing’ means standing up to the tyranny of the majority and affordable healthcare. They have no problem applauding the shutdown to stand up to Big government, while simultaneously bashing “Obama’s Shutdown”. They don’t see the irony in demanding the government listen to the People, but only to their small group of people. They ignore the hypocrisy in fighting a supposed Tyrant by advocating a dictatorial takeover of the government. Shoot, these “wacko birds” don’t even see the humor in screaming that the best way to protect the economy and the American dream of the future is to crash our economy and the American dream today.

If this wasn’t a political party, asses would fry. Imagine if the story was that “a well funded organization with members highly placed in government” poured hundreds of millions into campaigns over the years to encourage the destruction of the American government — those anarchist bastards would be tried for treason.

When Gambino brothers do it, it’s called the Mafia. When Koch brothers do it, it’s called lobbying for freedom.

Things are not going to change, at least not for a long time. The districts are too safe. Too many people enjoy treating government as an adversarial game. Too many people think the opposition party means they’re supposed to oppose government.

People don’t even want to change. They don’t want to learn or open their minds to new possibilities (that would be too ‘liberal’). They prefer to only absorb information that reaffirms what they already believe.

Our media won’t change. Adversarial crap makes for good TV drama, and the money come campaign-commercial time is too good to pass up.

So when government finally returns from this forced hiatus, be ready for more of the same: more obstruction, more partisan opposition for opposition’s sake, more intentional harm to the country and repealing of our nation’s benefits under the false banner of “Freedom”.

I feel like I need to watch some of those anti-bully videos that promise “It gets better”. Except it gets worse. Especially when the bullies take over the school, scream during the teacher’s entire lesson, throw out science books, shutdown the school, blame the bullied kids for not handing over enough lunch money, hang outside the cafeteria convincing students that handing over lunch money builds character, change the rules of dodge-ball so that only rich kids can throw the ball, ban the school nurse from treating freshmen transfers, insist the Principal clear all rules through the Bully Council, start their own school newspaper to contradict the mainstream school news, and then poop on your plate and call it #ObamasIceCream.

It’s not going to get better. This is your new Government. This is Amurika.

Ted Cruz, Sarah Palin

“Don’t worry, Amurika. We got this.”