Crap you should read Tuesday



Prisoner Swap

Israel– After 5 years of captivity, Gilad Shalit is the first Israeli soldier returned alive from Palestinian custody in 26 years. In what’s being been hailed by absolutely no one as the “The Herschel Walker of Prisoner Swaps”, Israel gave in to Hamas demands to release 1027 Palestinians convicted of violence against Jews and held in Israel’s jails and prisons.

1027 terrorists for one soldier. Wow. Around 450 were released 450 before Hamas would produce Shalit; the remaining 600 are to be set free in the upcoming weeks.

Shalit was 19 years old when he was captured during a deadly Gaza raid 5 years ago, and Israel retaliated for a while with military strength. After all, Shalit was the ONLY Israeli in Palestinian hands, whereas 6000 Palestinian “soldiers” are in Israeli custody. Even though most of the Palestinian prisoners were terrorists who will obviously stop at nothing to destroy the Jewish state, Prime Minister Netenyahu finally relented because they just couldn’t leave an Israeli behind enemy lines. But 1000 people? Who negotiated Israel’s side, Obama and Mike Ditka? (Continue…)

……Read the rest of the The Great Prison Swap in The Ryno Reports

Also check out:  Israelis morally conflicted on Shalit release —

"Yes Mom, I will....but tell me, who is this Snooki?"


Obama Call Out:

Ashville, NC — President Obama went on the offensive a bit at a campaign rally in Asheville yesterday, and compared his job creation plan to the ridiculous Republican plan. Obama talks about how his jobs will put teachers back in the classroom, fireman back in the station, etc (but of course doesn’t say how) and that the Republican plan calls for job creation by: “Dirtier air, dirtier water, less people with health insurance.”

It sounds almost like the President is talking shit, but then you realize that’s EXACTLY what the GOP is selling. The fact that it doesn’t sound nice doesn’t make it any less true. Republicans are pushing to eliminate laws against pollution, claiming the laws are too expensive and force them to cut jobs. Its also no secret that they want to eliminate Obamacare, which attempts to give all Americans health coverage, but doing so will “kill jobs”. All of these scenarios are more easily described as a choice between spending money to follow regulations that protect the people and the planet, or spending money on employees; but profits cannot take a hit. So the choice is your health v your job. Quite the hostage situation, no?

It would just be nice to hear Republicans admit this is exactly what they want, but they try to sell it as they’re doing the world a favor by fighting for removal of these regulations. Someone from the Right has to do a better job explaining to me how its better for America as a whole if corporate execs make more money, even if it comes at the expense of the air, water, or health. At the very least they should be pushing for universal health coverage so they can keep polluting our air and water…”hey you got your health insurance, stop bitching about your cancer and go to the Doctor!”

Read:  Obama says GOP wants dirtier air, dirtier water and less people with Health insurance —

Kamikaze Drones

Switchblades are more than smart-bombs, they’re quiet, light-weight (less than 2 kilos), small (can fit in a backpack), magic bullets with a pop. They portable Switchblade is launched by a soldier on the ground from a tube. Using onboard cameras, someone in an overhead support aircraft confirms the target, sets the trajectory and arms the bomb. Then the Switchblade locks on, corrects its course, and blows crap up.

The US government recently gave the Switchblade developers, AeroVironment a $4.9 million contract for immediate production,  so it looks like Al Qaeda will have something else to crap their pants about soon.

Read: US Army to fly “kamikaze” drones —



According to a recent Gallup Poll poll, 50% of American’s favor marijuana legalization. That’s up from from 36% 2006 and 12% in 1970. That’s an amazing stat considering another 15% were probably too stoned and misunderstood the question. Think there’s a correlation with increasing weed support and high unemployment?

Once the smoke clears, over 800,000 are arrested every year for violating weed laws. That’s almost a million people incarcerated and put through the legal system for weed. WTF? That’s 800,000 cells, 800,000 court cases, 800,000 people that need to be paid for and tended to by the state. Are you kidding me? For weed?????

Seems like the country is fed up with the ridiculousness of the Marijuana laws, which makes California’s recent crackdown of Medical Marijuana dispensaries all the more confusing. Regardless, I’d say that such polling numbers demonstrate that weed initiatives will fly through the ballots in 2012, but then I’d remember that supporters probably will forget to go out and vote.

 Read: Support for Marijuana legalization is at an all time high — Huffington Post


Invisibility Cloak

When I was a kid, I always wished I could be invisible; it had nothing to do with social-anxiety and everything to do with being a pervert. Now my childhood dreams are all that much closer to reality as scientists at the University of Texas in Dallas have created what could be the early stages of an invisibility cloak. While certianly nowhere near ready enough to sneak around Hogwarts under, the “cloak” is created when carbon nanotubes are heated. The heat off the tubes create soundwaves, and light from behind can be scanned and moved across those soundwaves to project an image. In the case of cloaking, the image is usually something immediately behind the object to make it blend in.

If that doesn’t make sense, check out the video below to see it in action. Otherwise you’ll just have to wait until a Klingon parks in your living room.

Read: Invisibility Cloak experiments draw comparisons to Harry Potter —


 Kangaroo WTF?

How is it that in all my years of Discovery/Animal Planet that I never saw Kangaroos acting like Badasses? Check the video below to see the Kangaroo take on moronic TV hosts and demonstrate why you don’t throw a leash on an animal that can kick your ass.

It’s awesome because he truly means it when he looks them in the eye and says “My ring’s outside….”

Read: Kangaroo kicks ass on TV show — Youtube


 Human Bad Ass of the Day

Providence — In times like these its tough to quit your job, but if you gotta do it, go out in style.  Joey was fed up with his treatment at the Providence Renaissance, specifically that they “Treat us like shit here”, so he led a little unionized rebellion. When that fell flat, he delivered the following F-U…



 Tuesday Fun

"We're gonna GRILL the Bat-man"

Ryan Reynolds is losing credibility by the day

Someone had to keep reminding Michael that he wasn't on the set of Fantasyland

Holy WTF???

The turtles made the same face when they watched her bang as well

Yuch, she doesn't clean

Pants, Crappy

Have a Horn-y Tuesday

Follow The Ryno on Facebook and Twitter or email


  1. My Shalit brings all the boys to the yard and damn right he’s better than yours. I could trade you, but I’d have to charge!

    What happened to Israelis as shrewd negotiators?!? You walk by the dead sea salt cart at the mall and you could have open wounds covering your body and STILL walk away having spent a couple grand convinced they hooked you up because you have a nice face!! I wonder if they threw in a cuticle file with Shalit too? I hope they rembered their 1’s for 10’a training.

    • What they didn’t tell you was that 1 Israeli soldier usually sells for 3000 terrorists, so they actually “Jew’d them down” a bit…(As a Yid, I’m allowed to use that term)

  2. It’s because of the krav magra isn’t it? Can I build up my value by studying the magra?

  3. Why does it seem as though our dear President has been campaigning for the past year as opposed to actually running the country. He walked into a shit storm when taking office I understand, but going on national television damn near every day to promote a new idea or tell the people what congress is not letting him do is a prop he is using to down grade the tea party. Great tactic if he wasnt already in office. Its a hostage tactic to make the republican party look bad by saying this idea will create jobs (no proof to theory) and the public eats it up and says hey he says it will create jobs but it wont pass. Must be the tea partys fault.

    My belief (which is what he said on 08) was when he was elected he would cross those political lines and work with the republicans to make this country work, yet it seems every move is just moving him farther left.

    And a quick question on the Weed issue, was the arrest data due to merely having it, smoking it, or selling it.

    • Prime Time- When you’re president, you have to get your programs passed. Since this Republican Congress has no desire to pass anything that Obama wants, he has no choice but to take his message to the people so they will tell their representatives to get on the ball. Plus, when the other side is on TV all day spreading misinformation, he has to take the podium to clear the air. He has gone over and above crossing political lines to make things work, but the other party has no interest in helping the country, only trying to ruin it to embarrass the sitting president.

      You may not agree with anything he does, but Obama is currently the only person actually TRYING to get something done, rather than waiting until the next election.

    • As for the weed issue, the arrest data is anything having to do with weed. Great waste of resources.