Crap you should read Wednesday (5/18)

It’s NAHT a Rumor:

Arnold Schwarzenegger decided to tell his wife Maria that he fathered a child with their housekeeper 13 years ago. This all happened before he was Governor, but he obviously he waited until he was out of office to avoid the political disaster. Why now? Was it guilt? Did he assume that a Kennedy woman can take anything? Doesn’t matter because Shriver upped and left the Sperminator.

Arnie is a notorious womanizer, so there is zero chance this is the only kid of his floating around out there. But the maid? That’s more Costanza than Conan. This Mexican/Austrian kid might grow up and sound like Arianna Huffington, but now he’ll be the most spoiled Austrian/Mexican since Hitler’s Chihuahua.

Arnold has weird taste — WWTDD

Pictures of Arnie’s son and mistress — WWTDD

Shriver left Schwarzenegger because he fathered a child 10 years ago — LA Times

How did Maria miss the obvious signs?

Mitt Romney is a Money Machine

If his fundraising is any indicator, Mitt Romney is going to be the Republican nominated to lose to run against Obama. Roms took in $10million on Monday alone, and is projected to haul in at least a cool $40 million this quarter. That, and his personal fortunate, dwarfs other candidates so far. The guy paid $42million just to bow out in the primaries in in his failed 2008 bid, so with inflation a full campaign might put on the hook for a Gazillion this time around. Recession or not, the Party of Fiscal Responsibility will gladly waste spend a larger chunk of their Tax breaks to  make sure they have a mouthpiece that will say whatever they want without any individual thought of his own.  He is a robot. He might “look the part” (read: rich white dude) but it wasn’t until Romney started following the McCain/Gingrich plan to say whatever his party base wants to hear, even if it contradicts everything he’s ever done since holding public office, that he became the perfect candidate for the GOP.

Mitt Romney is a money machine — Politico

"And this girl had BA-ZOOMS this big, I'm telling ya! I know! So you gonna let me hold ten thousand dollars?"

Republicans want to disenfranchise 21 million voters

Democratic mouthpiece Donna Brazile says that Republicans are doing whatever they can to keep certain voters at home by pushing voting “reform” in 30 states that would create stricter identification requirements and shorten absentee ballot windows for the 2012 election.

Why the push to do this? Basically because Obama won in 2008 because he brought out a shitload of NEW voters: blacks, hispanics, 20-somethings, etc. The new Republican plans would eliminate around 21 million voters from the electorate.

Makes sense, why try to fight the issues when you can just lockout the people who will never vote for you anyway? This is basically the Republican plan as long as I can remember…Democrats try to add more voters, and Republicans do whatever they can to Disenfranchise them. Hey, they’re strict Constitutionalists, I’m surprised they’re not trying to go back to the 3/5ths rule for Obama’s base. “Every vote counts, so long as its a vote for us!”

Republicans trying to keep voters home in 2012, Donna Brazile –  USA Today

"Hey Todd...Which guy is running for the 'Write-In' party again?"

Extreme Makeover: Lying Scumbag Edition

In March 2009 ABC pimped out the Cerda family home because Mom and the two young daughters suffered from Combined Immunodeficiency Disease. But when the Cerda family had to sell the house because they couldn’t afford their Extremely Madeover big digs, their plight caught the attention of some who thought the Daughters didn’t fit the typical mold for such patients. Turns out parents duped ABC, and made their kids fake illnesses just to get the house upgrades. Oregon has decided this is medical child abuse, and the kids have been taken from their parents. “Hudsucker by Proxy” made ABC the suckers.

Surprisingly this isn’t the shadiest scam pulled over on Ty and his crew. In 2005, 5 orphans sued a couple who adopted them to get pity from the Extreme Makeover crew, and then dumped the kids one by one soon thereafter. Hey, at least the Palin’s got a new house!

Family screws over Extreme Makeover: Home Edition — Yahoo

"How did we forget toilet paper??????"

NFL wins lockout ruling

The Court of Appeals has ruled in favor of the NFL, and now the lockout is officially here for the long-haul. The Court ruled that the Owners were suffering too greatly if there was no lockout. Not sure how this is possible, but now we have to wait until June for the next appeal. The only player happy about this is Chad Henne…apparently he can’t lose any games if there aren’t any games to play. This is going to be a long off-season.

NFL wins permanent stay  in lockout case — NY Times

 

Broncos players adopting new tactics to sneak in during the Lockout

Napoleon Dynamite Cartoon

Fox’s has taken another huge step in its crusade to make the world dumber and has added yet another cartoon to its prime-time lineup. This time it’s a series based on the cult classic Napoleon Dynamite, with the entire original cast supplying the voices. I can’t wait to hear everyone say, “You have to watch it again, its so much funnier the fourth time you see it.”

 

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2 Comments

  1. Hold up, that’s crazy talk. Donna Brazille says what? 21 Million? Disenfranchised?
    My Midwestern common sense nonsense alarm just went off.
    There are about 307 million Americans. In our historic 2008 Presidential election, only 132.6M people voted. She is saying 21 Million will be disenfranchised??? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voter_turnout_in_the_United_States_presidential_elections
    She is saying that 16% of voters will suddenly be disenfranchised because new laws say you need a government issued photo ID?
    Doesn’t make sense.
    South Carolina just passed a law…you need a driver’s license or government issued photo ID, or an absentee ballot. So?
    In Florida, I need my little card (with no bar code, photograph, magnetic strip, etc.) and a Driver’s License that has all of those things. Seems reasonable.
    In Florida, you get your voters registration at the DMV…don’t most people pick up a Driver’s License there? Of the 21,000,000 disenfranchised, do they just pick up the voters registration and skip the photograph, the Driver’s License or State ID altogether?

    Does Ms. Brazille think that we are idiots??? Photo ID’s are required for just about freakin’ everything, if you are telling me that there are 21 Million people who do not have photo ID’s in 2011 AND WOULD ACTUALLY TAKE THE TIME TO GO TO POLLING PLACE, I don’t believe it.

    If you are too disenfranchised to get your ass a photo ID to begin with, you have no business deciding the fate of the free world.
    BAM! Pull the Lever!

    • You’re right Stratton, stats usually lie, but even if its 5 or 10 million its alarming and disgusting. And everyone should have ID.

      But the incessant plans to TAKE VOTES AWAY before the election even takes place is just plain gross. I will do my best to point it out every time it happens.